Things that would send most people to the ER

I deal with symptoms almost every day that would send most people to the ER. This is an experience that’s fairly common among people with chronic illnesses, especially those of us with multiple chronic illnesses. As an example, I dislocate a rib about once a week. Often the rib will move out of place and then back into place all in the same motion, so there’s no bone for the ER to put back in even if I wanted to go. It’s just the pain left over from having a bone move where it isn’t supposed to. I’m also able to put my own ribs back into place most of the time if it happens to stay out. This is a painful experience but it has become a very familiar one too.  

I have a weird type of GERD called LPR. Very basically, I don’t have normal heartburn symptoms and instead have symptoms that mimic other things. Sometimes my vocal chords will spasm and it will feel like an asthma attack. Very often something in my neck spasms and feels like heart palpitations. Sometimes it will cause me to cough or have to clear my throat a lot and mimic a cold or flu. Those other things (asthma, heart palpitations, and illnesses) are also things I experience with some regularity so figuring out what is causing the problem can be tricky. 

Last night I woke up with what I thought was heart palpitations, but I’m now fairly sure it was GERD. I have POTS which can cause heart palpitations and also is affected by the position my body is in, so the first thing I did was try to move around to see if some other positions improved my symptoms. Moving did not help and while I was moving I accidentally dislocated a rib and my ulnar nerve in my left arm. That rib decided to stay out for several hours. So at that point I was experiencing what felt like heart palpitations, chest pain, some difficulty breathing, and left arm pain. My anxiety was spiking and I had to try to convince my already anxiety prone brain that I was not in fact having a heart attack. All this around 2am while trying not to wake my husband up. 

Situations like the above happen to me all the time. The list of things I have to monitor that most people never have to think about is a mile long. I monitor my blood pressure, my whole digestive tract, pulse rate, body positions (trying to avoid injuries), frequent allergic reactions, an overactive bladder, migraines, anxiety levels, and more. I’m always looking around for the nearest place to sit down, the nearest bathroom, the nearest place I can get food that won’t hurt me, etc… 

As I’m writing this today I am making sure to sit upright for the GERD, eating low acid foods, keeping my feet up for my POTS, make sure not to straighten or bend my left arm all the way for the dislocated ulnar nerve, keeping my shoulders and neck in good posture for the dislocated rib, and trying to drink plenty of fluids because that probably won’t hurt anything and it might just help. It’s a lot to think about while trying to do anything else. Chronic illness is a full time job, but not one I can go home from and forget about at the end of the work day. It doesn’t matter if I’m tired of having to manage all these things, I don’t get days off. My last symptom free day was at least 15 years ago. 

Perhaps this post is a bit whiny. I’m feeling frustrated with all of this and writing is one way I can vent my frustrations in a healthy way. I guess I’m just feeling extra tired of having to handle all these things. It leaves me exhausted and often overstimulated. I find when I’m monitoring so many things I tend to get overwhelmed easily. My anxiety and OCD symptoms flare up worse and I’m sometimes impatient or irritable. I do my best not to take things out on the people around me and I generally succeed in masking what I’m dealing with, but it’s always there just below the surface.